I am told that if I write in my blog people will read it. All this computer stuff is a little foreign to me so I have someone entering on my behalf. It also amazes me that people would be interested and amused by the happenings in my life. So for what it is worth, here is my journey through this fire, and what a blessing that I don't have to go it alone, but have you all to join me. Many of you are not merely spectators but active participants. Thank you all. I pray you will be blessed!
I am 32 years old, 17 years in the Lord. The Lord has brought me through many fires, but none as fierce as this. Mid December is about when it started or at least when I was alerted to it. Through many tests mid April I was diagnosed with stage 2 cervical cancer. They found a very large tumor the size of a baseball. Just about a week before I started treatment we had a big birthday party for my 5 year old son (one of 4 children). On top of one of his gifts, he received a colorful baseball. I often try to get rid of that ominous ball by throwing it outside, but somehow it keeps turning up in plain view, as if it is screaming "look at me! Here I am!" - a painful reminder of what is inside of me. Being bounced from doctor to doctor- 5 to be exact, they came up with a 5 week intense treatment plan of chemo along with external radiation, followed by 5 weeks more of internal radiation. With excitement in their eyes and sheer determination to "win" they set me off on this great adventure. I have often said I feel like I am in a video game with all the high tech laser beams and chemical warfare all trying to get the bad guy.
Week 1 Cisplatnium- the worst nauseating chemo you can get. 60 mg. Sick as a dog. Shaking with fear of my first treatment I sit down in the battle room(chemo room) with all the other troops (patients)
I sat next to a dear saint filled with the Spirit, uttering words of encouragement and praise to God, and I was brought to tears at God's glorious goodness of cradling me into the fire. All because of her kind and sweet speech worshipping our Savior.
Week 2 I was so sick that I had to go down for hydration. All the way to Burbank. To my mission field. Like Jonah, I am convinced, God has put me on the mission field, to cancer patients and those who care for them. Praise the Lord! I always wanted to be a missionary. The Lord has a granted my hearts desire, I have a mission field I cannot escape! Pray for those in the chemo room who have heard the glorious Gospel of our Lord, all because I was throwing up! God causes all things to work together for the good. Romans 8:28 Just about every time I was down there getting hydrated, I was given the privilege of sharing the Gospel. With everyone we meet there are two goals we should have: Evangelism if they are unsaved and edification if they are the Saviors'. Proclaim and build up. This is one way we can glorify God with all we come in contact.
Week 3 Still sick as a dog. Blood work good. Losing weight. "What about the kids?" they all ask. This question also haunted me one night in May. I wrestled with it and was unable to sleep well. If I die I'll go to Heaven, but what about the kids. Sometime before dawn the Lord brought me rest to mind and body. They belong to the Lord. They are not mine, He cares for them I need not worry, so in this I don't. Jesus said if you love brother or sister, son or daughter more than Me, than you are not worthy of Me. I love my kids and want to see them grow, but I want Christ more! So when people ask what about the kids, I know they are asking who is caring for them while I am ill. My answer to them is I go to a wonderful church filled with people who love the Lord and want to serve Him and me.
So you my friends, any of you who have served in any way, rides, childcare, cleaning, meals, (plummers). You are a witness of Christ to my doctors and many others. We will be a witness to the world by the love we have for one another, we learn in 1 John 1. So thank you all who have proclaimed the Gospel indeed, and the labor of your love is going out to the San Fernando and Santa Clarita Valley!
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
2 comments:
Nichole - we found your blog through Julie's and had been reading about "Nichole". It wasn't until today when I was talking with Donna Shannon that I found out that it was you!
We wish we were in the area and be one of the many volunteers....but distance will keep as ones praying for you and that Christ to be glorified through you.
Love, gale light
Nichole,
Know that you are being prayed for. We appreciate the updates so that prayers can be more specific. It is wonderful to see our Father answer in very specific ways. He is using many circumstances, including yours, to teach His body how to pray, be more bold, hold this world lightly, and refine us in many other ways. We will continue to pray for strength and boldness during this opportunity to share Him with others.
~Megan Brown
Post a Comment